There is a lot at work here, and I feel like there is great advice to be shared for the future "way too excited fan" that may prevent what happened in this photo from happening to anyone else who would like to look back on photo memories without cringing.
1. The nearly matching shirt. It's not like we called each other before the show, but you would think this at first glance. While we have never met in the past, one may choose to acknowledge that there would have been no way to know this would have happened. The best way to counteract "matching dude" issue is to always have a backup in your car, as you can't expect a rock star to care enough on his end to not match one of his fans. Take one for the team and help everyone else feel a little less awkward by taking the necessary steps.
2. Child predator/Serial Killer face. We all get excited when we meet someone who provides us with a great joy in our life. In this case, this is the singer from Karnivool, one of my idols, as I wish I could be a singer myself. This will never happen of course, because it would sound like what you might find Yoko Ono doing as of recent. You thought she was bad with John? You are in for a treat now. Regardless, you want to avoid this face for a multitude of reasons, as without a doubt it made Ian very uncomfortable, it made the person taking the photo uncomfortable because she knew it blew but would hate to ask to retake it, and now I have to look at my "I make furniture out of people" face every time I want to remember the show.
3. Bombarding the band in the alley after their show. Let's be honest, they were all sweaty and tired from over a full hour of kicking ass. More than likely, all any of them were interested in at that point would have been a clean shirt, some cash for the bar, some boobs thrown in their faces, and a little time to calm down before enjoying the evening. Imagine that you just walked off stage from a great show, and you're a little tired and uncomfortable, so you step out back to get some fresh air before you finish things up for the night. You open the door and feel the blast of cool, crisp fall air hit you as you step into the alley behind the venue downtown. Everything seems wonderful as you are on a large tour, making great money, and getting your name out there until you return to Australia to do your next album. You turn to your left and see some people near the street; they clearly know it's you and they are interested in talking. You reluctantly hold your ground and welcome these strangers, until you see matching shirt guy with child predator face walking way too Richard Simmons like towards you. This one encounter, without a doubt, derailed his entire evening, as instead of drinking Fosters that night like his native land would have preferred him to, he was drinking Blue Moon, and was more interested in going to a jazz club afterwards.
So consider this. Next time you are going to any event, whether it's a concert, movie premiere, book signing, what have you; take the time to prepare yourself ahead of time, focus on your photo face, and bring back up clothes. You don't want to end up looking like this, or worse yet, drinking Blue Moon and going to a jazz club on a Friday night.
I've had the opportunity to meet a lot of famous and semi-famous musicians over the years, and one thing that I've found is that no matter how 'cool' you think you played it, you walk away feeling like a dork.
ReplyDeleteCase in point: one night after a KMFDM show at First Ave. my friend and I saw Sascha Konietzko standing at the rear bar. My friend didn't want to say anything at first, but I had enough liquid courage in me to not really care if he told me to go fuck myself or not. I walked up to him, said, "Hi Sascha! Great show! I just want to say I'm a big fan and thanks for all the entertainment", or something to that effect. I noticed that he had just downed a shot of tequila, so I offered him another one. We both did our shots and talked briefly about the current state of his band and how he's enjoying the tour so far. I offered him another shot, which we did and then I thanked him again and bid him farewell.
Now that all seems very calm and not at all creepy, but I'm sure that while standing there at the bar fresh off the stage the last thing he wanted was some half-in-the-bag fanboy walking up to him and babbling on about this, that and the other. Later while walking to the car I felt like a huge dork and was sure that he found me to be a stammering idiot. But whatever. Am I ever going to see him again? Probably not. Is his opinion of me ever going to have an impact on anything in my life? Not likely. So with all that in mind, I'm glad I had the chance to freak him out.
You're right, I think I need to just learn from my past mistakes, but also embrace the fact that I will always come across as a little bit mentally deficient to my heroes.
ReplyDeleteI would like to say two things. First, I couldn't tell on my little LCD screen on my camera that you were making rape-face in the picture. Second, I think it only exemplifies your level of pride and excitement at the situation, not at all making you seem like a retarded fanboy. And who knows, maybe they're all sick of Fosters, anyway ;)
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